Now, don't get me wrong, I love my husband with all my heart but sometimes I just want to smack the shit out of the bastard. Somedays I seriously think he has a death wish and he wants me to be the Grim Reaper because there is no other way to reasonably explain why he would be stupid enough to egg me the way he does some mornings.
I'm not a morning person. I don't even have to try at not being one, it's just one of my many natural talents. Anyone who knows me knows to not talk to me until I have had my coffee and at least five minutes to sit. If you even look at me before then, well, it's your funeral and maybe I'll send flowers..maybe. So, you would think the man I have been married to for over 11 years and known for almost 16 would know NOT to start poking one of my buttons with a stick right away in the morning. Not even sending our cute little demon spawn to do the dirty work will save him my sleep deprived wrath. Dumbass mother fucker...
Maybe now, with his face firmly shoved up his ass and his mouth stuffed with cinnimon roll flavored stones (How hard is it to cook microwavable cinnimon rolls!!!), he will come to realize how much of a dumbassish act of knowingly annoy me the morning after I have worked a six day work week with very little sleep really is.
No comments:
Post a Comment